The past and future hover in my mind like dreams as the present is settled into its normal position by the webs of society around me. If I shake around a bit then I can feel the strangeness of what is beyond the normal social existence. (The normal social existence being the one where friendliness and obligation shovel you around hither thither until the very moment you fall to sleep or let yoursefl out of the norm.) Then you enter the rest of your life--or at least the bulk of it: the stuff that isn't happening right now--the stuff of the past and the stuff that hasn't happened yet....

Living so far from my past gives my memories a gentle feeling. They are allusive, they float like clouds in the sky of the mind, and they are constantly changing as clouds tend to do.

One's memories, one's options for the future mingle around one's mind just as the world's infinite events, actions, and reactions perpetuate indefinitely. And just as it's hard to realize how driving a car can actually make the earth's atmosphere warmer, it's also hard to imagine one's life in the middle of all the complex confusion of being. An inconvient truth it is that we are not able to perceive the earth and its connectedness, or even the workings of our own lives. It is a difficult condition of humankind that we are given a somewhat incomplete ability to be conscious, to perceive what's here and there, to understand ourselves through time. It's not all that hard to see that so many people have the same blinders that horses sometimes have on each side of their eyes.

Not to be negative, just mellowly reflective; my (human) attempts at awareness.